I'm Never Coming Back

I've found my perfect place in life. We arrived in the Lake District yesterday evening and it is my favorite place. I realize that I describe everything on my trip as just. so. beautiful, but the Lake District is the realization of every idyllic vision of England a person could have. The hills are so green and they're criss-crossed with stone fences that keep in all the sheep. I love the sheep! Especially the little black ones. I'll post pictures when I can.

We're staying on a farm outside Keswick. The farmhouse was built in the 17th century and the big wooden beams still cross the ceiling in the sitting room. Our bedroom looks out onto sheep and mountains. This morning we got sent off full of hot English breakfast--eggs and bacon and sausage and tomatoes and mushrooms and toast.

We attended church in Workington today (on the west coast of England) after getting thoroughly lost and having to ask directions of the locals. Once we actually arrived, they absolutely loved us up there. They hugged us and gave us candy and begged us to stay and one man offered to take me to Gretna Green and marry me. Amid the lovefest, I had this conversation with a group of older people, which I found amusing:

Kindly British Person: Oh, you could stay here. You could come stay with us. If you stay, you can have whatever you want!

MBC: I want a sheep farm with a sheep dog and some wellies to wear.

Kindly British Person: We can arrange that!

MBC: And I need a husband [put it out there when you have the chance in Britain].

Kindly British Person: We can get you one!

MBC: Can you? Because no one else has managed that.

KBP: (turning away from me) David! Where's David? (turning back) He's 28.

MBC: Oh, that would be okay (although older would be better)

Then the Kindly British Person and another person in the group conjectured over how much David had been kissed in his past and they finally decided between them that however much he'd been kissed, he could marry me. David himself did not get to weigh in on this because he was on the other side of the room bouncing little boys on his knees.